When God Gives Us People for a Purpose
God created us for relationships. From the beginning, He made it clear that being connected to other people was part of His design. Genesis 2:18 (NLT) says, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” God did not create us to live disconnected from everybody else, and there is nothing wrong with wanting companionship, friendship, marriage, family, or people we can do life with. Ecclesiastes 4:9 (NLT) says, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.” That is a beautiful part of what relationships are supposed to do. They can help us. They can encourage us. They can make some parts of life easier. They can give us somebody to walk with when life gets difficult. But sometimes we take something God created for our good and begin expecting it to become something more than He ever intended.
A relationship can be good and still get out of place. That is something we don’t always want to admit because we tend to think that if God gave us something, then whatever we do with it must be okay. But even good things can become unhealthy when we give them more importance than they were meant to have. A husband can be a wonderful gift, but he was never meant to become a woman’s entire world. A friend can love us deeply, but that friend cannot carry everything we need. Family can support us, but family members have their own limitations too. We have to remember that people are people. They have weaknesses, bad days, disappointments, responsibilities, and their own need for God. When we expect a relationship to constantly meet needs it was never designed to meet, we put pressure on that relationship, and God never sanctioned that.
When We Forget What the Relationship Is For
Sometimes the problem isn’t the relationship itself. The problem is that we have forgotten its purpose. Instead of asking, “How can we help each other become who God called us to be?” even if we don’t admit it, we start asking, “What am I getting out of this?” We can become so focused on what another person gives us that we stop paying attention to what God may want us to give.
Scripture says in Proverbs 27:17 (NKJV), “As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” There is something important about that picture. Iron sharpens iron because there is purpose in the relationship. We should be helping each other grow, becoming stronger in God, making better decisions, and becoming more like Christ. That doesn’t mean every relationship will always feel good or that everybody will agree with us. Sometimes the people God puts in our lives will tell us the truth when we don’t want to hear it. Sometimes they will encourage us when we’re tired. Sometimes they will challenge us when we’re wrong. That’s part of what healthy relationships can do.
Don’t Let the Relationship Take God’s Place
We have to be careful when something that God gave us begins taking the place of the One who gave it. That can happen with marriage, friendships, family, children, church relationships, and even ministry. We can become so dependent on a person that their approval determines how we feel about ourselves. We can become so afraid of losing someone that we tolerate things God never told us to tolerate. We can put so much pressure on a relationship to make us happy that we forget that no human being can carry that responsibility. Colossians 2:10 (NLT) says, “So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.” That doesn’t mean we don’t need people. It means we need to know the difference between needing people and making people our source. God can work through people to bless us, encourage us, teach us, correct us, and walk with us, but they are still people. The relationship has a purpose, but Jesus Christ is still the Head.
There is nothing wrong with wanting good relationships. We should want people in our lives who love us, pray for us, and tell us the truth. They can help us get through some of the things life brings our way. But we have to be honest enough to ask ourselves whether we are allowing a relationship to become more important than the purpose God intended for it. If we are constantly looking at what someone can do for us instead of how we can walk together according to God’s Will, something has shifted.
God did not put people in our lives so we could make them responsible for our peace, our identity, or our entire sense of purpose. He gave us relationships so we could love, serve, encourage, sharpen, and help one another along the way. When we keep God in His rightful place, we can appreciate the people He gives us without asking them to become something they were never created to be.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
“When Relationships Become More Important Than Their Purpose”, written by KLizzie, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.
