I received a phone call recently from a Christian woman who’s been single for a little while. Like many of our sisters out there patiently waiting, she’s attractive, savvy, stable and witty. She’s at a point in her life where she’s expecting God to bless her with a good man any day now. The only draw-back is that she finds herself being the pursuer instead of being the one pursued. Not long ago, she was introduced to someone by a friend and they decided to meet up for a bite to eat. They both agreed, “No pressure, just a casual meeting.” She was surprised by how literal he took this.
Come on now, you know how we do. Even though it was casual, sister-girl still had, “First date” on the brain. She got a little dolled up because we all want to leave the best first impression we can. Well, that wasn’t quite the approach he took. As a matter of fact, it didn’t appear as though he had put much effort into making his best impression at all. His appearance left something to be desired and his demeanor was lackluster, but after dinner she still sent him a ‘thank you—nice to meet you’ text later that evening. Days later, nothing—zilch—nada—crickets. No call, no text, not even to say hello.
She called me and asked if she should be the one to call him. My response to her, “Absolutely NOT!” It’s not about playing cat and mouse games. It’s a matter of how we truly see and value ourselves as women. There are people in your life that appreciate you, and you know this because they make you feel appreciated. Just as game recognizes game, light recognizes light. Heavenly Father wouldn’t make a presentation of a marital partner who can’t see our light and appreciate it. He tells us as much in 2Corinthians 6:14 when He says that light and darkness can’t have communion with each other.
We hear a lot of negative talk out there about how challenging it is to find a good man. Is that the truth or is it that we’ve listened to it for so long that it has blinded us to the truth? We don’t often hear about men who understand the treasure of a good woman and express it, but they are out there. And we don’t have to chase them down. That would not be a response of faith, but fear. Relationship drama is notoriously broadcasted on every form of media we can think us. We see the ugly live and in technicolor, and it has really done a number on many of us. The arrogance, meanness, and pettiness has made us so afraid of trusting one another, that we’ve convinced ourselves it’s not possible to find a man that’s a match for our level of decency and moral character. Understand that God is brilliant beyond brilliance, and intelligent beyond intelligence. If you’re alive and breathing, you can trust that another like you is near, and God has taken care of all the details of your meeting one another, but your trust in God is a must.
Amos 3:3(KJV) poses an interesting question that cuts right down to the meat of the matter. Amos was a prophet who learned what many of us have found challenging to learn in life. He asked in this verse, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” There must be agreement for us to walk with God, and there must be agreement for two individuals to walk together as partners, but most importantly, you must have agreement with yourself. Agreement is consistency, compatibility, conformity, and harmony that is based on God’s truth. Your truth is that you are God’s daughter! You carry His Holy Spirit within you, and you are loved by God to such an overwhelming degree that it will take you an eternity to explore its depths. God’s got you! He wants you to have the best way more than you could ever want it for yourself. He said in Jeremiah 29:11(ESV), “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” You must trust that every detail of your life’s fulfillment has been taken care of by Him.
Romans 8:32(NLT) declares, “Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else?” God is a God who blesses His people, but we can’t forget that as His people, we have a responsibility as well. Jesus Christ said in John 14:15 that if we love him, we will keep his commandments. Don’t get ahead of God. Instead, pray without ceasing. You don’t have to rush love, because love knows how to wait on God’s perfect timing, and you should too.
Real love is God’s love, and it doesn’t push, shove or force. Love is kind and gentle, and it comes to us as effortlessly as we give it out. We can’t make someone love us, but we can make a commitment to love God with all our hearts and live by the example of Christ. We must be as patient with ourselves as we would want our partners to be. We are learning that our love must be expressed through our faith in God, and our destiny will beautifully unfold once this practice is firmly in our grasp.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Love Knows How to Wait” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.