Sometimes People Need to Experience the Love of Christ Before They Need to Hear Our Advice
A few months ago, I met a young woman who is twenty-one years old, has a one-year-old child, and is engaged to the father of her child. I saw her recently, and she asked me for relationship advice. She shared with me that her fiancé had become verbally, mentally, and physically abusive toward her. She said she felt helpless and was looking for “an escape plan.” As I sat there watching tears roll down her face, I was speechless. I wanted to say something that would help her, but in that moment, I realized she didn’t need me to preach to her. She needed compassion. She needed hope. And she needed someone to hear what she was saying and understand that what was happening to her was serious.
Sometimes when people are hurting, we can be so quick to tell them, “Everything is going to be okay. Just give it to God.” Yes, we should absolutely take our troubles to God, but sometimes people need us to sit with them in their pain before we start telling them what they should do with it.
2 Corinthians 1:4 (NLT) says, “He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” God has comforted us through some difficult places. And when somebody else is hurting, we have an opportunity to extend that same compassion to them. That doesn’t mean we will always have the right words. Sometimes our willingness to listen, to care, and to be present speaks more than we realize.
There have been times in my own life when I’ve asked, “God, why me?” Why did I have to go through this? Why did I have to experience that? I don’t believe everything painful that happens to us happens simply so we can help somebody else later. But I do believe God can take what we’ve been through and teach us how to have compassion for somebody who is hurting. Romans 12:15 (NLT) says, “Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.” Sometimes we can weep with somebody because we remember what it felt like to hurt. We remember what it felt like to be confused, afraid, disappointed, or to feel as though we had hit a brick wall. We may not have experienced exactly what they are experiencing, but what we’ve been through can teach us not to dismiss the pain of somebody else.
1 Corinthians 9:22 (NLT) says, “When I am with those who are weak, I share their weakness, for I want to bring the weak to Christ. Yes, I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some.” Paul understood something we sometimes forget: reaching people isn’t always about standing apart from their weakness and telling them what they need to do. Sometimes we have to be willing to come alongside them. When people know they can talk to us without being condemned, dismissed, or judged, it creates room for us to show them the love of Christ. We don’t have to pretend we have all the answers. We don’t have to turn every conversation into a sermon. Sometimes we simply need to listen, pray, offer practical help when it is needed, and allow the Holy Spirit to show us what to say and when to say it.
Jesus showed us this kind of compassion. Matthew 9:36 (NLT) says, “When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” He saw people. He saw what they were carrying. And when hurting people come to us, we need to see them too. There will be times when they need biblical truth. There will be times when they need wise counsel or practical help. And there may be times when someone is in danger and needs help getting somewhere safe. But whatever the situation, we should never become so quick to give an answer that we fail to hear the person who is standing in front of us. Sometimes sharing in the weakness of others begins with something very simple: we care enough to listen. ■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Sharing in the Weakness of Others”, written by KLizzie, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.
