There are just as many good men out there as there are good women. To second guess this truth is to diminish the brilliance of our Heavenly Father’s intelligence. There is a man that equals your capacity to love, and he is desiring your brand of specialness as much, if not more, as you are desiring his. However, sometimes our attention settles on a man that has a lot of the qualities we appreciate, but he isn’t uniquely suited to walk with us through life. No matter how much we try to force this square peg and make it fit, it simply isn’t going to. This can be a very disappointing situation. We all want to be loved in a meaningful way, and some of us will expend a lot of energy trying to pry it out of a man. As daughters of the Most High, our confidence has to get to a point where we never feel the need to receive something from a man that he clearly is not willing to give.
Our Heavenly Father cannot fail. He doesn’t disappoint. This must be the foundation of our hope for the wonderful life He has made available through Jesus Christ. God wants us to have this life, and He wants us to enjoy it right now! For generations, we have heard many folks of yesteryears talk, teach, and preach about making it to that great by and by. Life on earth was so difficult for them that thinking of the afterlife in heaven was their only great comfort. It is true, and cannot be denied, that nothing compares to heaven. It is more majestic, brilliant, supernatural, and extraordinary than our imaginations can hold, but you and I must never, ever forget that we’re in a different place than those of yesteryear. Those before us couldn’t have dreamed that we’d have access to the amount of knowledge and revelation we’ve learned from God’s Word. They thought they had to die to experience God’s glory, we now know we’re meant to have it right now!
The psalmist wrote in Psalm 23:3-5(NLT), “3 He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name. 4 Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. 5 You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings.” Reading this ought to inspire within every believer a joy that bubbles up and runs over. This passage describes the vast richness of God’s exorbitant supply, and His supply is not limited in any way. The only thing that would limit the flow of it into our lives is a limited mindset regarding what God can and will do.
I was reminded of this kind of mindset by something that happened to a friend. She called and asked if I would give her a ride home from work. Her car wouldn’t start, her daughter was out of town on vacation and her mother didn’t drive, so she asked me to drive her home. As I was getting my keys, I received a call from her. She said she was all set and didn’t need a ride after all. A male friend of hers had returned her call, and said he was on his way to pick her up.
The next day I called to make sure she was all set with transportation home from work, or whether she’d need my help in any way. I inquired how she had made out the day prior. She hesitated in her response. She said her friend never made it to her job, and she ended up taking the bus home. I gasped. I told her she should have called me, but she said she was too embarrassed. You see, this male friend was someone she’d hope to call hubby one day. They had dated off and on for the last five years.
Colossians 3:12-13 (NLT) tells us, “12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” As God’s children, we must be holy people with a Godly attitude, and we must not demean or cast dispersions on anyone’s character. It is not for us to say whether the on-and-off-again boyfriend had wrong intentions towards my friend. He could have had good reasons for not showing up, but there’s a bigger picture here.
The on and off pattern in their relationship paints a picture of a person’s attitude towards commitment. It could be that he isn’t interested in marriage, or it could be that he has reservations about her being the one for him. Either way, it is important that every daughter of Zion recognize that continuing to make herself available for this kind of treatment does more damage to her quest for marriage than help.
As God’s daughters, we should never be arrogant and entitled. The marriage commitment is one that requires humility and a heart for service. 1Peter 4:10 (NLT) says, “God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.” We must view the role of a wife as a ministry to serve our families. So, it isn’t about pride, it is about the honor we attribute to the Spirit of Christ that lives inside us. In and of ourselves, we are flawed in many ways, but we are being perfected each moment of every day. What we carry on the inside of us is invaluable, and if we understand and appreciate this, we will honor the Gift, and desire a man that demonstrates the capacity to honor it too.
Please see the parallel between limited thinking regarding God’s capacity to bless, and ultimately settling for a man who shows you nothing more than a limited understanding of who you are and what you carry. We receive in proportion to what we believe. Let’s raise the roof on our believing and faith! ■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“Raise the Roof on Your Faith!” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.