He Who Finds

Proverbs 18:22(NLT) is one of the most well-known verses among believing women that are praying to cross paths with their future husbands. It says, “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.” Our hope should be that a man will, number one, understand it’s his responsibility to find a wife, and number two, we hope he’ll know beyond any shadow of doubt that a wife is a treasure. The third piece of knowledge that Proverbs 18:22 bears out is perhaps the most important of all. It tells us that when a man is engaged in the process of seeking and finding a wife, he receives favor from the Lord. This is a sure way to discern the quality of a good future husband. If he’s not seeking a wife, either you’re not his treasure or he’s missing out on God’s favor.

You have to wonder why every man isn’t rushing to find themselves a treasure of a wife. What could they be thinking? Could it be that they are behaving as if Proverbs 18:22 doesn’t apply to them? If this is true, it is indeed sad. Some men endure tremendous hardships in life. They become stuck without the benefit of God’s favor, and they never consider the possibility that the consequences they face may be linked to the way they view and treat women.

In today’s modern culture, it seems that some men are not looking to find a wife, and many of us make it very easy for them not to. A woman can never expect a man to give her something he doesn’t want to give. It takes two people that are willing to invest in each other in order to make a relationship work. Both the man and the woman have to be committed to this goal. The thing that makes this commitment stick is their belief in each other’s worth through the Lord Jesus Christ. This is one of the very few occasions in life where it can’t be a one-sided deal.

Sometimes in relationships, one person gives more than the other, but ultimately it works out. However, when either of them do not hold the other in the highest place of respect and honor—when they do not greatly value one another in Christ, they have nothing to work with.

1 Peter 3:7(MSG) says, “The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God’s grace, you’re equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don’t run aground.” When a man doesn’t honor the woman that he desires to marry or has married, and he violates his covenant with her, this interferes with his prayers. In other words, when he dishonors wifey, his prayers are blocked and won’t get through. This is not a man that any woman should desire to marry. We should desire a healthy marriage, one where you will be the blessing and treasure God talks about and so will your husband.

Ecclesiastes 4:9(NLT) says, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.” Most of us understand the value in having people in our lives who we can count on, but when it comes to the significant person in your life, you need more than lip service. There should be tangible evidence of the love of God moving in this person. Being married to someone that God has ordained will bring a special kind of fulfillment, peace, and joy; it will be undeniable. We would do well to really allow the Lord to steer us in this area of our lives, and not make assumptions based on what we think. God will show us what it means to be valued as a treasure, so that we treat our future spouses this way, and we accept nothing less than to be treated this way ourselves. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

“He Who Finds ” written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2020.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.

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