1 Corinthians 7:3-5(NLT)
“3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”
There’s no need to tiptoe around it. The question that is on the minds of many single women that desire marriage is when it will happen. Part of encouraging one another towards the goal of marrying well is to speak the truth in love. There are some subjects that believers have been known to tiptoe around, and one of them is physical intimacy in the marital relationship. It’s a deeply private issue, but also a very necessary and natural discussion to have, especially before you get married. God said in Genesis 2:24(NKJV), “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” We need to have a serious conversation with God about becoming one with the man that He desires to walk with us through life. The habits we’ve developed, and the expectations and incorrect beliefs we have around God’s plan for becoming one, will need to be addressed before we take that walk down the aisle.
Quite frankly, for many singles, the habits they’ve developed when it comes to satisfying the flesh are ones that were adopted from society. It’s so far from God’s Word that people don’t even believe they can be married to one person for life anymore. They assume divorce is inevitable, and that on a whim people are free to fall out of love as quickly as they fall in love. This isn’t the ‘becoming one’ that God had in mind. His grace is sufficient toward us, and He forgives our shortcomings, but we can never place ourselves or our own personal agendas above God’s standard.
Our faith towards marriage can’t be built on what society says, because that’s not faith. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. It comes by the truth, so if we abdicate God’s standard, we no longer have the truth, and a person cannot have faith if they don’t believe and trust the truth. God’s Word is the only solid foundation that exists, and if we try to build a marriage without it, we’re in trouble.
One of the things we’re witnessing is that there is a tremendous amount of people who believe that God will reward them when they haven’t walked according to His Word. We can’t pretend to be committed to God; we must really be committed to Him. We have to love Him with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength. So, if we are truly honoring God’s standard of becoming one with the man we will marry, we must repent from becoming one with men that we didn’t marry.
To repent is to have a change of heart and mind. It’s to completely change the way we’re thinking and believing about something so that our thoughts, feelings, and actions line up with the example of Jesus Christ.
Our Heavenly Father ordained that a husband and wife become one before Him. You and I have no other choice but to conclude that He did this because it was very important to His plan. When we step outside the boundaries of what He has ordained, repentance is critically necessary. Heavenly Father wants to give us the blessing we greatly desire, but He cannot reward us if our hearts are too stubborn and arrogant to recognize we need to repent. He wants to help us lay up treasures so that we don’t allow the enemy to continue to steal from us. There must be within us a Godly sorrow for not doing as the Father commanded, for it is in this deep place of remorse for our actions against His Will that we can also accept His forgiveness.
Whether married or waiting to meet our husbands, we must not allow satan to tempt us with a lack of self-control. Our desire to please God must be greater than our desire for any other thing, because this speaks to our commitment to Him. Throughout God’s Word, He continually reminds His people to be holy and committed so He can bless them. He’s very willing to aid us and has placed His Spirit within the born-again believer to guide, teach, and comfort us. We must be settled and clear in our minds and hearts that physical intimacy was sanctioned by God for marriage. This is His standard, and nothing is comparable to God’s perfection. He never changes and He always tells us what pleases Him, and what pleases God is always best.■
Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.
“God’s Will Is for Two to Become One”, written by Kim Times, edited by Reverend Fran Mack, for Sundie Morning Sistas ©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord! SMS is dedicated to inspiring and encouraging Christian Women through the Word of God.